she kept yelling 'call me bella'
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
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