Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
