Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
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