i just google imaged poop.
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Randomize
