You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize
