Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Randomize
