If i come over, it means nothing
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
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