I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Randomize
