'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
Randomize
