How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
