Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
