I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Randomize