whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
Randomize
