I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
I came so hard my ears popped.
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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