let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
Randomize
