and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
Randomize
