my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
Randomize
