I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
Randomize
