You work out of a Hotel?
Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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