A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize
