Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Randomize
