I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
