Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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