We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
