i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
someone owes me an orgasm
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
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