I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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