sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
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