So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
what day is it and did you see me today?
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
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