will power is for people who don't want to get laid
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
My vagina just recognized that song.
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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