Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
two words...techno handjob
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize
