Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
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