PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
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