I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
