How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
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