Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
