I faked an abortion last night.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
