So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
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