Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Randomize
