Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
You may now shotgun with the bride
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
Randomize
