If that was your dad, he is hot
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Randomize
