the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
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