Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
This house was built for laser tag.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Randomize
