you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
Randomize
