The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
Randomize
