i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
