i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
