how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
Randomize
