So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
I understand Curling. That high.
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Randomize
