he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Randomize
