Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
no you cant smoke seaweed
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
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